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Chapter 4b-1
For my birthday, Mom and Dad gave me five lovely
notebooks and letter sets. Ako gave me a sand-glass. Hiroki gave me a
blod-tipped ballpoint pen with four colors. He said I shouldn't cry any more
that I'm 17. Kentaro gave me a book titled Shiroi hito, Kiiroi hito (White
People, Yellow People) written by Shusaku Endo.
My Wishes on Becoming 17 Years Old
I want to go to a bookstore and a record shot. It's difficult even in my
wheelchair. I can't move my hands the way I want to, and I often make
mistakes operating it.
If I could go to a bookstore, I'd buy Gone with the Wind and Anya
Koro (A Dark Knight's Passing) by Naoya Shiga.
If I could go to a record shop, I'd buy an LP of Paul Mauriat's music.
I tumbled in the bathroom. I couldn't stay balanced on
tiptoe (I may no longer be able to do that) and I fell down on my bottom with
a thud. I wasn't hurt but I was scared. Yes, I'm scared.
I wonder if my disease can heal naturally? I'm now 17. I wonder how many more
years I'll have to fight against it until God forgives me . . . I can't
imagine myself at the same age as Mom is now (42). I couldn't imagine
becoming a second grader at Higashi High, and now I'm afraid I may not be
able to live till I'm 42. But I want to still be alive at that age!
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First part of
chapter 4. This is not a long entry and apparently people would like to read
more since I haven't updated, so I will write 1 more after I'm done cooking
my noodles :p.
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